I wasn't planning on writing a blog tonight, but while researching a photo project, my computer screen landed on a page where instantly all of my 1000+ instagram photos were in front of my eyes. These are iphone pictures of my daily life from the last 18 months; pictures that are intimate, bring back precise memories of moments, good and bad, and small stills that have captured my life much like a diary. I was struck by these photos, and I needed to tell you about it. I needed to tell you how thankful I am that I am alive and healthy and happy. I needed to tell you that my bank account doesn't have enough money in it, and that my house is way too small. I wanted to tell you that I've been feeling guilty about not running or doing yoga, and that my jeans from last winter are tight. I wanted to tell you how I've been feeling - like nothing I do is ever enough. Not creative enough. Not hard enough. Not big enough. Not good enough. I wanted to tell you that despite all of this, I looked at 1000 pictures tonight that made me realize I am amazing. My friends are amazing. The experiences I've had over the last year and a half have been incredible and I am a better person for all of it, even if I'm not where I want to be. And if nothing else, instagram has at least reminded me that yes, my dog IS adorable, the food I eat is epic, and the people I know can't be traded in for anything.
So (raise your glass) here's to Thanksgiving and being immensely thankful for this life. Here's to you and to me, and all of the moments in between that make us feel alive. For this, I am thankful.
Photo of me by the one and only Travis Marak
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