treasure house.

It's a comforting feeling I've come to appreciate. The feeling of being myself.

This last year I've had a lot of really low moments. Moments of doubt and frustration. I've had to write a million lists to keep my head straight and I've adapted the habit of talking to myself in my head. Not looney, cooky stuff, but the kind of things a friend would have to sit you down and say to bring you back to reality. 

Patience, Patience, Patience.

I can't preach it to myself enough.

This industry takes a lot of patience. And although I've worked hard and put myself forward into a lot of less-comfortable situations to get where I am today, I've come to realize again and again that just being myself has brought me most of my success. And this is so invaluable to me. Every time something good comes from it, It feels like a warm hug. It feels like a Mexican hot chocolate on a rainy autumn day. It feels like someone saying, "See...your treasure house is within. It contains all you'll ever need."

This was the first quote, of many, Eileen Rafferty gave our class at RMSP on the first day of school. It has stuck with me always. It's from Hu Hai. 

So, when the new RMSP catalog and website came out a few days ago, I was blown away to see two of my (large!) images to yet again grace the pages. And although I did submit pictures, all along I was just being me. I was just doing what I love. 

Here is last year's web page images:

And, this year!...

Annnnd this year's catalog!...

(beautiful cover photo by my friend Athena)

my photos!

I used to memorize these catalogs and this website for years, wishing I could go and wishing I knew how to take images of the same quality as the ones gracing the pages. I feel like I've been watching a play from the audience and have switched roles with the lead actress. I'm not the photographer I want to be yet, but when I really stand back (I mean really far back) I can see it. I can see how far I've come.

p.s. thanks to my BEAUTIFUL friend Callie for being such an amazing model.