For the last few months I've been having a more than normal amount of vivid dreams. A colleague suggested after a frighteningly realistic pregnancy dream that I had been eating too many nightshades. (Apparently nightshades cause vivid dreaming.) I did have some homemade salsa the night before, but decided to blame that dream on all of my many, many friends who are pregnant right now. Last night I frantically awoke to myself whimpering/crying in my sleep. It was the second or third dream I'd had lately where my dog died. But after allowing myself to relax and go back to sleep, I had another dream, and it's this dream I can't stop thinking about all morning.
At the very end of the dream I was with a small group of friends and family and we had to walk down this flight of stairs that was so steep and high off the ground that you had to use both your hands and knees, like a ladder, to get down. To make matters worse we were above the ocean and a boardwalk where cars and people were below. After a relaxing afternoon of shopping and eating, our group was headed back to the parking lot and everyone ahead of me quickly made their way down as they laughed and talked, not realizing I was struggling behind them and afraid of heights. Every time I moved my foot or hand I thought about it slowly and with doubt. My body was filled with fear and I hoped no one would look back to realize I was so far behind in the embarrassment that they'd discover my weakness. It was at that point that I overheard one of them say that heights didn't bother them.
At the very end of the dream I was with a small group of friends and family and we had to walk down this flight of stairs that was so steep and high off the ground that you had to use both your hands and knees, like a ladder, to get down. To make matters worse we were above the ocean and a boardwalk where cars and people were below. After a relaxing afternoon of shopping and eating, our group was headed back to the parking lot and everyone ahead of me quickly made their way down as they laughed and talked, not realizing I was struggling behind them and afraid of heights. Every time I moved my foot or hand I thought about it slowly and with doubt. My body was filled with fear and I hoped no one would look back to realize I was so far behind in the embarrassment that they'd discover my weakness. It was at that point that I overheard one of them say that heights didn't bother them.
He said, "It's simple. If you don't think so much about what's in front of you and just take steps, then before you know it you are where you want to be without the doubt and fear getting in the way. It's over thinking it that becomes the problem."
Dear readers and friends, THIS is my problem. I've been told a lot lately that I'm in my head too much, which in a round about way is why I haven't been blogging or why my career hasn't taken off like I want it to. I've been thinking a lot about this, and constructively working through obstacles to overcome it. I know what I need to do. Maybe this dream is just my wake up call, a smack in the face rather, to stop looking at each step in front of me, and instead just move.
I hope this inspires you on obstacles you are trying to overcome.
I hope this inspires you on obstacles you are trying to overcome.
-What fears do you have?
-What's stopping you?
-What do you think about too much and why is it so hard to let go and just do it?
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